Tuesday 27th August 2024

Pains have subsided (for now). Today is my mother's birthday, as usual we probably won't be doing much as it was also my step-fathers birthday yesterday. Although he has been here since my real father left me when I was 3 years old, so I don't really call him my step-father. He's been there for me for as long as I can remember. My mother isn't as stable as she used to be, she has severe arthritis, and her spine is slowly deteriorating. They fear that it won't be long until she requires a wheelchair, I try to help her, but it's unbearable the thought that she might be unable to walk eventually. My father doesn't help a lot in the house, he's usually sleeping or out somewhere that nobody knows. But I know he still loves us the same even if he has a hard time showing it. We had a BBQ yesterday, but as usual they only bought enough food to cater for 1 day. And so my mother will have to cook food for everyone on her birthday, something she isn't happy with. 

It took until I was 6 years old for the doctors to realise I had ADHD, before that they said I was just young and that is was normal. At secondary school, I was sent to a school for people who had special needs. A school ran by a charity known as Barnardo's, I was known as quite a gifted individual. I also went to a college at the same time, where I studied IT. 16 years old is when I came out as gay, but later in life realising that gender didn't matter to me, so I came out as pansexual. I finally feel like I can be me, and my nekomata character helps me too. I've made mistakes, and probably will make countless more. But I will never stop being who I am.